Too Early To Yell
You might be thinking that my spellcheck has mucked up. You may be wondering if my typing skills are crap. But no, I haven’t accidentally hit the Y instead of the T button on my keyboard. I did mean to type “To Early To Yell”, because I believe that yelling at Day 9 in a relationship says it all!
Ok back to the beginning, where girl meets boy. Although my instant reaction was laced with a touch of disappointment, as his looks and misinformed height did not tug at my hormones, his sweetness did pull at my heart strings.
ALERT! The signs appeared early!
With a glazed over expression of infatuation, he overly expressed comments such as “you’re amazing” and “I can learn so much from you” and “wow you’re sexy and smart”.
This man child expressed many early emotions, yet had little else to say. He used the excuse that I was so interesting that he was happy to listen to me all night. Ignorantly, he wasn’t reading the sign on my forehead that read “WARNING – BORED WOMAN!!”
Ridiculously, I did what I often do as I heard the echo of those voices who accuse me of being too fussy and deciding too quickly – you know, the people who insist you don’t listen to your instincts, which opposes the important message that spiritual and intellectual leaders have been reteaching us for years. I say reteaching as most of us are aware that the logical world beats instincts out of us as children!
For 9 days, I sat in my ego and lapped up one compliment after the other. My ego can be evil as she loves being adored and tells my soul to shut the fuck up! But as always, my heart starts to yell loudly and my soul is forced to wake up.
On Day 9, we had a difference of opinions that lead to a doozy of an argument. I was attempting a intellectual and somewhat meaningful conversation using some of the interesting things I have learnt in books and at seminars, written and held by some amazing leaders in Personal Development, such as Deepak Chopra, Anthony Robbins, Oprah and Abraham-Hicks.
I say “attempted” because you can’t have an intellectual and deep conversation with someone who is paranoid and infatuated! I asked him if he knew what he wanted in a partner. His answer was simply, “Someone to love me unconditionally”. When I tried to discuss how I’ve learnt the importance of going deeper and clearer and then embodying what you want so that your energy vibrates to attract what you want … well well well, that was when all hell broke loose and he actually started yelling at me!
The number 9 represents the completion of a cycle – Yep, screaming at me when trying to discuss personal development and ones spiritual quest is a sure way of getting kicked out of this girl’s bed! My Soul, my Mind, my Heart and even my body sang in unison to flee the pits of relationship hell and head back to singles heaven and wait as my Prince was due to arrive in any second!
When the moment strikes, when my ego balances with my spirit, to some I come across as deep and reflective. To this idiot, he thought I was attacking him because I had asked him if he knew what he wanted. Paranoid much!
To be yelled at for having my own opinion. To be yelled at for using intellect in a conversation. To be yelled at for seeking the same depth as some of the great minds admired on the planet. To be yelled at for having travelled the world and feeling pride in learning from those experiences. To be yelled at Day 9 in a relation FULLSTOP.
Day 9 yelling was enough justification, because in MY OPINION, being yelled at on Day 9 in a relationship negates “Too Early To Tell” because it’s just Too Damn Early To Yell!
So, on Day 10 – number 1 numerologically – I ended it – And yes, I got yelled at again!
DELETED and BLOCKED!
